As you may have guessed by now, I do not have the film finished.
I'm taking a break until after the first of the year.
I will admit, though, I really do need a break. If you know me personally you know the truth of that statement.
If you know me personally, you also know how hard I
resisted fought the very idea.
I spent the spring and summer researching and writing about biblical genealogies and a national radio show. The amount of detail involved, the complete dissimilarity of subjects and writing styles, combined with creating characters on a level I never before attempted was daunting to say the least. I was so involved in these projects I got a little stuck in my head. A mental fog slowly and imperceptibly descended and lingered. Even after the scripts were finished I pushed ahead into post-production on the film.
I never really got my head back after those projects until last week, when I finally
committed surrendered to a complete break until January.
Once I gained a little clarity and perspective I wondered, WHY have I been pushing so hard to complete this film?
One reason is that I have another writing/directing/acting project that begins after the first of the year, along with Ladies' Day and women's ministry responsibilities kicking into higher gears. Having the film unfinished means I won't be able to give them as much attention as they need.
Another is that it would be nice to actually finish something and have it STAY FINISHED. The vast majority of things I do on a daily basis are things that have to be done over and over. There is always another meal to fix, another load of laundry to wash,another spot to clean, another drop off and pick up, another message to answer. Lather. Rinse. Repeat. Ad nauseum. Once the film is release it is D.O.N.E. -- DONE.
And, quite frankly, I am excited to see what happens when it is finally released. I'm interested to hear what people say, both good and bad. I want to see how others are blessed because God is working through the five loaves and two fish He gave me.
But what it really boils down to is that I want it done because I want it done. The problem is I never really asked The One Who Commissioned The Film In The First Place when HE wants it done.
I consulted my calendar instead of my Creator.
However, my friends, there is no need to fear. I still have a zillion other lessons to learn. I'm sure, if you're still interested by then, I'll share them with you.